Not sure why, but today CHOICE(s) seems to be my word.
As of today, I have been home for a week. Ok...so maybe as of late tonight
it's been a week. Today is also my very best friend's (who also happens to be my husband) birthday. Happy Birthday
I’m usually really good at keeping myself mentally, emotionally and
spiritually balanced. I try to not
expect more or less from others than I am prepared to give myself. My philosophy in life is...If you’re not experiencing soulful happiness
you must look within yourself in order to find YOUR answers. It sounds easy enough but the truth is,
telling ourselves the truth is not as easy as telling someone else the
truth. The other fact is, for every
action there is an equal and opposite reaction.
In the life of people, that means – any decision a person makes...it
WILL effect at least one another person; including the act of taking to action at all.
June 18 I left for San Luis Obispo California where I studied for the better
part of two weeks in order to complete and attain my Soul Coachingr accreditation. As I prepared for that trip I was terrified
about what the future held for me. After
all, I’m not only a woman I’m also a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. and in many cases a mentor. Over the past few months I had made so many choices, in order to embark on
a quest that has so many unknowns; but that felt soulfully right in many ways.
For as long as I can remember people have sought me out when they were looking
for answers to whatever questions they had as they were dealing with one issue
or another. I have always been in awe of
the possibilities and wonderment of children and youth. So I hurt when I see so many young people making
choices that are self destructive and ultimately life ending. I don’t believe I ‘give’ answers, but rather
I help others find the answer within them self.
When they “get it”, it is truly a magical moment! It’s like watching a child beam when they
conquer some milestone. They just seem
to illuminate. As adults we seem to lose
that over the years but when it happens...it is truly very exciting!
My Camino was booked before my Soul Coachingr accreditation course - there are no coincidences
in life and the timing couldn’t have worked out any better. Just because I said ‘better’ doesn’t mean I
meant ‘easy’ or wonderful. I knew things
would be changing in my life and I also knew challenges would be waiting for me when I finally returned home. After all, I had formed my own business "It's the Butterfly Effect Inc ~ Helping you find order in life's chaos" and a non-profit organization "Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying Inc". They say nothing worth having comes
easy. And almost every day on the Camino
I saw the saying “No pain. No glory.” (with the image of two feet batterd with blisters)
And how many of you have heard ‘no pain – no gain’. I’ve never liked those messages. I don’t believe one must feel pain in
order to appreciate things or the people in their lives; nor do I want
Life is about choices and sometimes those choices are very hard for us to
make. In fact, most of us will decide to
choose NOT to make a choice at all, in order to avoid the discomfort of making
a choice or dealing with the outcome of our choice ~ but choosing not to make a
choice is still a choice. Sooner or
later, the issue you chose to ignore rears it’s self again. We have to face our fears or we can become a
prisoner in our own lives. If you
continue to choose not to make a choice, out of fear, the choice WILL be made
for you. And that....ultimately was YOUR
choice. Maybe, for you, the outcome is
favourable and maybe it’s not. If it was
favourable...great; but what if it isn’t then what?
I remember hearing a man (Dr Phil – and I’m
not really that much of a fan of him) say “You thought you made the
right choice; now make the choice right.”
In that situation a person made a choice to take an action that impacted
many people. Then, that person decided
they simply didn’t want to do that anymore
– which would then greatly impact those same people once again. I could share more of what Phil said, or even
impart my thoughts/opinions but the reality is some choices are more easily
made than others. When we’re faced with
those tougher choices, it’s very important to be sure you’re being honest with
yourself. Each choice has a natural consequence. Sometimes the consequence or consequences
cannot be foreseen nor can the action of the choice be taken back.
Never would I support choosing to remain in a situation that you would
consider is harmful for you, but before you make a choice you must be
completely honest with yourself. A wise woman I knew use to say "Once said, ten times regretted." The same principle would apply any action one takes. So before you make a choice you may want to ask yourself questions such as: Am I willing to own my role and take
responsibility for my actions? What role
did I play in creating this situation?
What would I like to see different?
Do I really want to change
things; if so how? What can I do
differently? What am I willing to do
differently? If I make this choice want
are potential outcomes?
is YOUR choice so are the actions you take.
The decisions you make must be based on what you’re willing to do and/or
capable of. They cannot be based on what
another may or may not do or promise to do. Regardless of the outcome, the choice(s) was
yours and you must be prepared to own it without passing blame on someone else.
If you’re choice is going to directly impact another, or others, you may wish
to talk to the party(ies). They maybe
feeling similar and the options you consider together could be more than just those you
first thought about. Sometimes, talking
also helps clarify misunderstandings as well as resolve a conflict. At very least it could help and/ may be even eliminate
making a "choice" without all or more of the facts.
Sometimes our choices are as simple as which foot to move first. Other times, our choice could be as complex
as whether to literally live or die. Whatever
choice you’re faced with, be sure you take the time to be honest with
yourself before you making your choice.
Wishing you clarity no matter where you are in your life, so you are open to
receive life’s abundances with joy and confidence.
As always, many blessings, Carleana
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