A week later....

Not sure why, but today CHOICE(s) seems to be my word.

As of today, I have been home for a week. Ok...so maybe as of late tonight it's been a week. Today is also my very best friend's (who also happens to be my husband) birthday. Happy Birthday Bubba!!!!!!

I’m usually really good at keeping myself mentally, emotionally and spiritually balanced.  I try to not expect more or less from others than I am prepared to give myself.  My philosophy in life is...If you’re not experiencing soulful happiness you must look within yourself in order to find YOUR answers.  It sounds easy enough but the truth is, telling ourselves the truth is not as easy as telling someone else the truth.  The other fact is, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  In the life of people, that means – any decision a person makes...it WILL effect at least one another person; including the act of taking to action at all.

June 18 I left for San Luis Obispo California where I studied for the better part of two weeks in order to complete and attain my Soul Coachingr accreditation.  As I prepared for that trip I was terrified about what the future held for me.  After all, I’m not only a woman I’m also a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. and in many cases a mentor.  Over the past few months I had made so many choices, in order to embark on a quest that has so many unknowns; but that felt soulfully right in many ways.

For as long as I can remember people have sought me out when they were looking for answers to whatever questions they had as they were dealing with one issue or another.  I have always been in awe of the possibilities and wonderment of children and youth.  So I hurt when I see so many young people making choices that are self destructive and ultimately life ending.  I don’t believe I ‘give’ answers, but rather I help others find the answer within them self.  When they “get it”, it is truly a magical moment!  It’s like watching a child beam when they conquer some milestone.  They just seem to illuminate.  As adults we seem to lose that over the years but when it happens...it is truly very exciting!

My Camino was booked before my Soul Coachingr accreditation course - there are no coincidences in life and the timing couldn’t have worked out any better.  Just because I said ‘better’ doesn’t mean I meant ‘easy’ or wonderful.  I knew things would be changing in my life and I also knew challenges would be waiting for me when I finally returned home.  After all, I had formed my own business "It's the Butterfly Effect Inc ~ Helping you find order in life's chaos" and a non-profit organization "Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying Inc".  They say nothing worth having comes easy.  And almost every day on the Camino I saw the saying “No pain. No glory.” (with the image of two feet batterd with blisters) And how many of you have heard ‘no pain – no gain’.  I’ve never liked those messages.  I don’t believe one must feel pain in order to appreciate things or the people in their lives; nor do I want to. 

Life is about choices and sometimes those choices are very hard for us to make.  In fact, most of us will decide to choose NOT to make a choice at all, in order to avoid the discomfort of making a choice or dealing with the outcome of our choice ~ but choosing not to make a choice is still a choice.  Sooner or later, the issue you chose to ignore rears it’s self again.  We have to face our fears or we can become a prisoner in our own lives.  If you continue to choose not to make a choice, out of fear, the choice WILL be made for you.  And that....ultimately was YOUR choice.  Maybe, for you, the outcome is favourable and maybe it’s not.  If it was favourable...great; but what if it isn’t then what? 

I remember hearing a man (Dr Phil – and I’m not really that much of a fan of him) say “You thought you made the right choice; now make the choice right.”  In that situation a person made a choice to take an action that impacted many people.  Then, that person decided they simply didn’t want to do that anymore – which would then greatly impact those same people once again.  I could share more of what Phil said, or even impart my thoughts/opinions but the reality is some choices are more easily made than others.  When we’re faced with those tougher choices, it’s very important to be sure you’re being honest with yourself.   Each choice has a natural consequence.  Sometimes the consequence or consequences cannot be foreseen nor can the action of the choice be taken back. 

Never would I support choosing to remain in a situation that you would consider is harmful for you, but before you make a choice you must be completely honest with yourself.  A wise woman I knew use to say "Once said, ten times regretted."  The same principle would apply any action one takes.  So before you make a choice you may want to ask yourself questions such as:  Am I willing to own my role and take responsibility for my actions?  What role did I play in creating this situation?  What would I like to see different?   Do I really want to change things; if so how?  What can I do differently?  What am I willing to do differently?  If I make this choice want are potential outcomes?

Remember...this is YOUR choice so are the actions you take.  The decisions you make must be based on what you’re willing to do and/or capable of.  They cannot be based on what another may or may not do or promise to do.  Regardless of the outcome, the choice(s) was yours and you must be prepared to own it without passing blame on someone else. 

If you’re choice is going to directly impact another, or others, you may wish to talk to the party(ies).  They maybe feeling similar and the options you consider together could be more than just those you first thought about.  Sometimes, talking also helps clarify misunderstandings as well as resolve a conflict.  At very least it could help and/ may be even eliminate making a "choice" without all or more of the facts.

Sometimes our choices are as simple as which foot to move first.  Other times, our choice could be as complex as whether to literally live or die.  Whatever choice you’re faced with, be sure you take the time to be honest with yourself before you making your choice.

Wishing you clarity no matter where you are in your life, so you are open to receive life’s abundances with joy and confidence.

As always, many blessings, Carleana