I have not become lax in
my Camino, and I have been writing my blogs.
However, several things might suggest differently so....I’m taking this
time to check in.
First, as I mentioned I
have been writing my blogs and until this morning, I thought I had posted
them. Clearly, somewhere in the process,
I’ve not completed a step. The next
couple of days will be busier but I will endeavour to ensure those posts are
updated.
The second thing that
has taken my attention is the matter of my divorce. OMgoodness....I can’t believe this!!!!! Never in a million years would I have ever
imagined I’d go through what I’m going through....I know I’ve said this
before....and not for a second did I think I was immune to the possibility; I
was simply naïve enough to think we were a little more mature than all this
drama and BS.
I am so tired and, in
truth...I’m pissed off, (sorry for the language) but I am dumb founded by the
attitudes, behaviours and the system. I
have conceded to ‘consider’ waiving certain issues; in the spirit of resolving
this quickly and too...on numerous occasions I’ve accepted offers that left me
and my children at an extreme disadvantage financially. I’m done.
I’ve reached the point where I’m accepting the minimum of what the law
states we are entitled to and...you guessed it...even that has been an issue
with the EH - estranged husband.
Whatever...he and I had a traditional marriage, WE worked together to acquire
what we have...no one of us did it all on our lonesome – and certainly not ‘the
big guy’....and together we had three amazing children. Just because he said “I don’t want to be
responsible anymore” doesn’t mean he has the right to deny our children or me
what we are entitled to; but an honourable person wouldn’t need to have the law
involved to ensure what was right, was what was being done. Again....whatever!
Newton’s third law of
relativity....for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.
I’ve no idea how or when
this will finally be resolved and...when the “reaction” comes knocking at the
EH’s door....I hope the universe shows more kindness to him then has been shown
to us.
Which brings me back to
the Boar....being an animal most don’t really give much thought to except at
our breakfast; bacon....its spirit is actually quick ingenious. On a day where I was feeling somewhat
defeated and completely at a loss of what to do next...I pulled a card from my
deck “Messages From Your Animal Spirit Guides” oracle cards; the Boar.
When considering
conflict – especially relating to affairs of the heart – and hoping to overcome
them so all may maintain dignity....these are empowering and inspiring
words. I’m speaking to the conflict and
not the individuals or the situation.
The situation...is what it is...when individuals make the situation
about power and control over another, using vindictiveness and revenge against
the other; managing the matter ceases to be about the situation but rather...it
become about the conflict. And for no
other reason than for EGO....money is wasted, time is dishonoured and
worse....people are devalued.
I love life....and I
want to live it to its fullest.
And...like the Boar...that means sometimes my feet will get muddy. I guess what’s important for us all to
remember is...mud washes away; it even dries up and falls off. Sometimes...muddy feet put things back into
perspective and...sometimes...mud squishing between the toes feels good. There are people who pay a ton of money for “Mud
Cleansing” too. The point is....muddy
feet is no reason to panic, cause drama or even escalate a situation into a
crisis.
In honour of the Boar –
at least for today – I will not eat my bacon or....any pork product.
Today, tomorrow and for
always....believe in yourself and...have the courage to stand in your truth
with confidence and compassion.
In kindness....Carleana
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